But Where Are You Really From?

August 13, 2020

‘Where are you from?’ I’m asked.
‘The UK,’ I reply.
‘I mean where are you really from?’
‘Zambia,’ I reply.

In this blog post you will find a short video of Amanda Khozi Mukwashi reading from the opening chapter of her book But Where Are You Really From? The extract is also included to read alongside.

‘Where are you from?’ I’m asked.
‘The UK,’ I reply.
‘I mean where are you really from?’
‘Zambia,’ I reply.

Where are you from? It’s a common question. A question that helps to open conversations, allows us to connect through shared stories and brings us closer together as we affirm each other, our common heritage and our humanhood. It establishes our kinship. In most cases, this question is for those who look like us, sound like us and come from the same nation, region or town. It’s a kinship. For many people from visible ethnic minorities in the UK, however, this question is almost always followed by another question: But where are you really from? A simple question. One that is very familiar to those who have had to answer this question many times in their lives. As a Black woman born and currently living in the UK, I have lost count of the amount of times that I have been asked it. And, simple though the question may seem, the issues that simmer beneath it are infinitely more complicated.

Let’s assume for a moment that it is you who has asked me the question. Already a complexity of emotions is bubbling up inside of me. At times, I find myself pre-empting the question completely and introducing myself as being ‘originally’ from Zambia - perhaps a defence mechanism? Other times I find it mildly irritating, very frustrating and even insulting. Then there are the times where I am just plain disappointed, where I feel let down because I think you should know better. While it may not have been your intention – and whilst I cannot speak for all visible ethnic minority groups – for me, this simple question is loaded with a subtle, sometimes even subconscious, intention: to place me on a weighing scale. You may say ‘but where are you really from?’ but instead, I hear: ‘where are you in relation to me.’

But Where Are You Really From? is a thought-provoking book about identity from CEO of Christian Aid, Amanda Khozi Mukwashi. Through telling the story of her experience as a Christian black woman with Zambian heritage, born and living in the UK, she explores issues of race and culture and how it feels to be judged on skin colour when identity is made up of so many things.

Learn more >